I've been riding it every day since then. In fact, it's been a bit painful on the right hamstring (my kicking leg) which took me by surprise a bit. I've been trying to learn how to stop properly. It seems the best technique for me to learn at this stage is footbraking. That doesn't mean breaking your foot, incidentally, but using your foot to slow down the board.
Yesterday I was riding through the park and a group of girls whistled and waved at me. It seems I'm drawing attention to myself, although that wasn't my purpose.
On Friday I had the pleasure of going to Nat and Nick's wedding. It really was a great time.
The wedding was at St Aldates Church in Oxford which is a very nice place indeed, although I did spot a masonic symbol on a wooden panel inside the building. That point aside, the place was very nice.
One amazingly awesome moment was when Nicky, the bride, entered the ceremony. It was the most spectacular entrance of a bride I've ever seen. No, she didn't abseil from the ceiling or ram-raid through the wall (although they would be fun) but she had the most amazing music ever.
In keeping with the North American way of doing weddings, the bridesmaids came down the aisle first. They came one at a time, interspersed with the occasional flower girl distributing petals on the floor and not quite seeing what all the fuss was about. Just as the last bridesmaid reached the front, the music reached its climax and in came the bride and her father, a beautiful sight to behold as the choir sang. The track they used was Benedictusfrom The Armed Man: A Mass for Peace by Karl Jenkins.
I played bass with the band, since Joel couldn't make it. I've played a few times before although not very much. The church had a bass so I just had to show up and use it. However, when I got there I discovered it was fretless. In case you don't know, playing a fretless bass means you have to get your fingers in EXACTLY the right position or the note will be out of tune. I'm not sure, but I don't think I'd ever played one before. Well, I played at the wedding all right. By the end of the practice I had a blood blister and a regular blister on my two "plucking" fingers. It went ok, though.
One of the other cool things that happened that day (though not as spectactular as Nicky's entrance) was seeing The Queen. Yes, I really did. It turns out that while the wedding was in progress, Her Majesty was visting Christ Church just across the road from St Aldates. After the bridal party left, some of us were fortunate enough to be in the right place at the right time as The Queen's car left Christ Church and drove right past us.
Being the organised sort, I had my camera phone close to hand and made sure to capture the moment as best as I could. The Queen was sitting in the back-right seat, wearing a pink suit and matching hat. She waved to the crowd as she passed but since she was on the far side, I didn't get the best view. Still, for one brief moment I saw her and that was amazing in itself.
I was thinking of how much we lowly people get excited about seeing the rich and famous. I don't tend to be really interested in the private lives of celebrities or any of that sort of thing, but it was special to see The Queen. We waited there for some time but there were those who had waited much longer. I'm sure there were those who waited for hours and their reward was a passing glimpse of the head of The United Kingdom - a genuine royal figure.
Although the experience was so transient, each person's life was changed for ever. I'm sure all of them would have told at least someone that they saw The Queen that day. Something of that magnitude has to be passed on.
Having said all that, consider our response in church when we meet with God. Do we really believe we've met with the creator of the universe? Do we honestly think that we've had a moment where someone more powerful than The Queen has not only passed and waved but stopped and interacted with each and every one of us on a deeply personal level? I think half the time we think we made the whole thing up.
I know I've had experiences of God. I have no doubt about that. However, I don't know if it's the invisible and therefore less tangible nature of God or if it's simply the enemy sowing doubt, but we feel incapable of talking to other people about it sometimes. Maybe we think they just wouldn't believe it. I don't know quite what it is, but I know I was much more of an evangelist for my queen encounter than I've been for any of my God encounters, and that's something that concerns me.
I had an interesting experience on Sunday that I thought was worth mentioning. We were having a curry festival at church to raise money for our Rio Trip and we were all going to dress up in suitable curry-related clothes. Well, since I had lived in Pakistan before, I had my own Shalwar Kameez. I decided to wear that along with my Pakistani waistcoat and Afghani cap.
So, I walked to church dressed like that, not really expecting anyone to make a fuss about it. Well, I hadn't got far when I got a very extreme reaction in Queens Park. I was walking along a fairly wide path (wide enough for a car or two) and there was a middle-aged to elderly Scottish lady walking her dog, heading towards me.
As soon as she saw me, she did a MAJOR body-swerve and walked as far from me as possible, along the opposite side of the path. I think if there was a road in the middle to cross, she would have but given the fact there was only the path, she didn't have the choice.
As if that wasn't bad enough, it got worse when she actually passed me. I was going to smile and say "hello" or something like that if she looked at me but she actually turned her head away as she passed and actually slightly raised her arm towards me as if to protect herself from my obvious evil presence. It was SO bizarre. I've never seen anything like it.
Walking through Govanhill, a Pakistani man congratulated me on being well dressed. I'm not sure if he thought I was a convert to Islam or if he just liked seeing someone wearing traditional Pakistani clothing.
When I was at church, a number of people tried to joke about my appearance by saying things like "I'm surprised you didn't get arrested walking here dressed like that" or "Do you have a bomb vest under there?" It actually really angered me. I don't mind people poking fun at me if they think my hair's ridiculous or if they don't like my taste. I mean, whatever, have your opinion. I think what I reacted to so much about the comments was the ignorance and judgment it demonstrated.
I happen to really care about people from the Middle East - Afghanistan in particular. It's horrible to think that for many people here in Scotland, whenever they see someone dressed in middle eastern clothing they immediately judge them as some kind of scary terrorist. I feel for the innocent people who fled the horrors of war in their homeland only to be judged and treated as wicked here by the people who have offered them refuge.
This is tremendous! I can't believe they are at 150 already. I remember e-mail 100 like it was um, not very long ago.
Some amusing quotes from this latest episode:
"Oh-ho-ho! Swirly photo-shop magic! I bet this thing could release some serious kacko demons." - Strong Bad, when The Cheat "mashed go" on his Alternate Universe Portal.
"Zounds! A sarsparilla swimming hole! Last one in's a freemason!" - Old Timey Strong Bad, when Tiny Handed Strong Bad unearthed a massive mug of Root Beer in the "Dig to China with your ears" contest.
The song at the end is pretty good too - "Save the last e-mail for Strong Bad".
Saturday was a special day for me. It was in fact the day I became twenty-nine! It's a fairly daunting age numerically as the landmark thirty is only one trip round the sun away.
I had a really great day, though. It started off with Collin waking me up by phoning me to invite me round for breakfast. (I had slept in because I was programming into the wee hours the night before.) After hurriedly getting dressed, Collin arrived and whisked me away to Chez Gibson where we enjoyed bagels with bacon and a soft cheese that I forget the name of, mixed with mint. (I think it was mint anyway.)
We chilled for a bit and most family members phoned me at some point or other to wish me a happy birthday.
Another highlight was the voicemail I got of Dad singing "Happy Birthday" to me. Ah, 'twas a special moment!
Later in the day I popped into town to get a Mother's Day gift - for Mum of all people.
Ali, my sis, then came up to Glasgow for the evening and we hung out for a bit before going to the cinema to see The Pink Panther. It was ok but not the best. I preferred the original series because they had more slapstick gags in them and also the humour was more innocent back then. The new one had all sorts of sexual innuendo and things like Clouseau dropping a Viagra tablet down the plug hole. I wish they could just make films that were FUNNY without having a sexual theme.
Anyway, that point aside, it was a great day. I felt special which is always a bonus on your birthday!
I was also glad that I didn't feel miserable or depressed about clocking up another year. I feel more peace now about the fact that God's ordering my steps so I shouldn't get in a flap about how much I have or haven't done with my life at this point. The important thing is that I'm following him as best as I can and you can't ask for more. I suppose the danger when you feel a dip, as I did recently, is that you start doing things motivated by your own frustration more than by God's timing.
The scripture that helped me get over the frustration of the tedium of my work was from the book of Colossians:
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
Pushing the buttons in front of a screen Morning to night and the hours in between The sky's often grey, but sometimes it's blue Always observed from the same window view
Making some money, my bread and my butter Surely my feelings on work shouldn't matter But somehow I find as I sit in the dark I'd rather be having a laugh in the park
To like what you do, to love your vocation Is this such a rare thing in our gloomy nation? The only incentive - to eat and pay bills Suppress fancy notions of "God's perfect will"
On Saturday night, Glasgow got a fair dumping of snow. It was really quite amazing, especially since it's MARCH! Well, I daresay this erratic weather is due to Global Warming or the like but I decided to make the most of it.
After church tonight, my good friend Collin and I went to Queen's Park to do some snowboarding. At first it was just going to be plain riding on a fairly unimpressive incline until Colin showed me a ramp he was building. Intrigued, I allowed the evening to take an entirely different direction! In case you're wondering about the colouring of these, they were shot in "night mode" and there was actually a surprising amount of light for 11:00 pm!
I was so excited to discover how much fun it is to do jumps in a park that I walk through all the time. I didn't need to travel, get a lift pass or even take time off work. What a great night!
This first offering is a commentary on the structure of the ramp we found and consequently improved!
Next up is a video of me jumping over the fence, using the previously mentioned ramp. It was a bit scary given the fairly steep approach and the small margin for error. If I missed the ramp, I'd plough into the fence!
We moved to a different area and built another ramp out of "borrowed" snow men. This clip shows me hitting the jump a bit too slowly to really clear it.
This was cool. I managed to stay standing after a jump. I didn't manage to ride it out because I got kinda stuck on a lump of snow that was meant to be the down-slope. Keep watching to see me perform a kind of 180 on the ground. I don't know the proper name for it. You lean onto the front and whip 'er round.
This is monumentous! I went over the jump, landed and kept riding! How sweet is that? It felt so good to land in control of my situation! Now I just need to add some finesse to the equation and maybe a bit more height. I love this stuff!
I realise I maybe skimmed over a few important details (quite unlike me, really) last night when I uploaded the first of my videos for my video blog.
In order to watch the videos, you will need to download QuickTime. The files my phone produces are 3gp files and QuickTime is the only program I know of that plays them. I'm sure there must be others but since I already have one installed on my machine that works, why would I bother looking for more? I don't do things like that "just out of interest" since it doesn't interest me!
Ok, so if you go to http://www.apple.com/quicktime/download you can download QuickTime. This might actually be a good opportunity to download iTunes which includes QuickTime but also lets you buy music online. If you don't care about that and you just want to watch the videos, go to the QuickTime page instead.
Once you get there, uncheck the boxes offering things like news subscriptions and click on the big "Free Download Now" button. The program will download to your computer.
After it's downloaded, find the file and double-click on it then follow the on-screen instructions. Usually this just involves pressing "Next" lots of times until it goes away. (Do you like the technical explanation from the programmer here?)
Once it's all up and running, you should be able to play my videos. Click on one of the links to a video, choose where you're going to save the file and then open the file once its downloaded. If everything's working, it should open the file in QuickTime.
My wee sister, Ali just got back from Australia a week ago and amongst other things she brought me a boomerang. The instructions were pretty amusing. At first I was going to type them in here but I decided against it.
What I do have instead is far more exciting! I have SIX videos of me playing with the boomerang in a popular park in Glasgow. Check them out:
Haha! Can you believe it? Just when you thought the Internet couldn't get any stranger, Ken goes and works out how to upload videos for all to see! Yes, up until now it was only pictures and text. Revenge of the Ken - this time it's multi-media!
Whenever you see a picture with a QuickTime player window round it like this one above, simply click on the image or the text below it to watch the video. What could be simpler?
As I mentioned already, I'm going to Brazil in May/June to help do some work on a run-down school in a really poor part of Rio. We've now got a page set up on our church website with a bit more information. There is also a link there to make a donation via PayPal, if you are interested in doing so.
Years ago, a fish was born. Ok, it might have been hatched but either way it came into existance. It probably didn't have a name or indeed much of a life but it was a tuna, so it was well looked after and didn't lack much.
Elsewhere, in a seemingly unrelated story, a hen laid some eggs. I think the hen had a name but it was more like a number, "10937.7". (No, really - it did have .7 on the end!) It might have had the luxury of being of the "free range" persuasion but more likely it was cooped up in a ...erm..coop and didn't see any more of those eggs after they rolled away through a maze of complex egg-gathering contraptions.
Meanwhile a cow chews the cud and performs a number of other cow-like activities that I will not elaborate on at this point. Her name is Mildred. Hopefully Mildred has escaped the wrath of the "cow tippers" who can damage a cow's milk for life (so I hear) by the trauma infliced on the poor beast. Speaking of milk, Mildred happens to be in fact a dairy cow, and today is milking day. So along comes the friendly farmer and milky-milky there you go. Mildred-minus-milk carries on the rigours of cow life.
In the dark soil of another, quite possibly distant field, a potato grows. I would be very surprised if it had a name but let's just call him Bob. Well, Bob's been sitting around for a while and it is with some alarm that he hears a rumbling sound as a potato-gathering-device-ok-I'm-not-a-farmer-give-me-a-break came along and wheeched Bob clean out of the ground. I say "clean" because this was one of the state-of-the-art kind that clean the potatoes as they're plucked from the bosom of the earth.
Bob's encounter with the potato plucker was nothing compared to what would happen to him a few days later. You see, he was baked for a while in an oven along with some of his pals, introduced to some butter made with Mildred's milk, some mayonnaise made from 10937.7's eggs and the meat/flesh/edibles of the nameless tuna from Paragraph 1! They were all then promptly carried home and scoffed by me for lunch today, giving me the energy to write a meaningless entry in my blog just now.
It's good to know that your life serves a higher purpose. Isn't it, Bob?
This past week we made another bold attempt at finding the cave. Spirits were high and confidence in the nineties when we set off at 7 pm on Friday night. I know what you're thinking, "7 pm in February? Won't it be dark then?" Well...yes, it was. And I know we couldn't find the cave before and ended up sleeping on the beach in the rain as a result but this time was different. You see, we'd been back during daylight and found the cave then so it meant this trip was much more likely to succeed.
As it turned out, we found it really easily this time. There were no wrong turns or stopping for directions. It was a guys' navigational dream come true. We got to the cave at 9 o'clock and made a fire. Well, Alan and Collin made a fire while I sat about and wondered when I'd finally learn how to make a fire.
We ate some food and eventually went to bed, or "bag" as the case may be. It was a bit chilly and slightly damp, although very tame compared to the DELUGE we slept under that fateful night last September. There was the occasional drip but that was all. I was sleeping on a slope, though, and whenever I woke up I found myself half on top of Alan whose only response was a slightly different snore to the usual one.
In the morning we got up and made some rolls and sausage. The sausage meat was cooked on a piece of slate which was pretty impressive work on Alan's part. Again, I was more of a spectator than a real participant. I did participate in making the food disappear. I've been doing that for years so I'm quite good at it by now.
We had a wee walk round to the top of the cliff overlooking our campsite. Collin "happened" to bring his abseiling (rapelling to you N. Americans) equipment with him. After a look around, we found a pretty good spot to anchor the rope and he proceeded to set up the equipment and then cheerfully hurl himself into the abyss, slowed down only by his skill with a rope. I thought he was mental. Then he tied the harness etc. onto the end of the rope and sent it back up to me using the pulley. "There you go!" he shouted and all of a sudden I started to feel a tad uneasy.
You may be forgiven for wondering why a rock climber such as I would go weak at the knees at the thought of abseiling. The main reason is that I'm used to using a "GriGri" for belaying. This device has an automatic locking mechanism so if you suddenly let go, it catches you. Well we were using the "old school" option of the basic abseiling device. If you let go of the rope with this one, you fall at full speed. (Still reading Mum? It's ok, it's got a happy ending!)
It took me a considerable length of time to convince my body to roll over the edge of the cliff while holding the rope quite firmly in the "locked off" position. I was so nervous I almost backed out and gave up completely. Finally when I was hanging there, it was pretty good. I didn't do it exactly right, though. The proper way to descend is to let go your grip slightly on the rope to let it slip through your hand. Well, I kind of chickened out and fed the rope through my hands a few inches at a time. It was pretty pathetic really, looking back on it. I mean, Collin was bouncing off the wall (his feet, it was his feet) and there I was going down at about 2 feet an hour.
So there we are. That's another couple of "firsts" for me. My first sleep in a cave and my first abseiling experience. Hey, I just realised something. I wanted to do something new each year and I've done that already in February. I need a new goal now...
I leave you with a picture I took of a stream as we made our way back to the car.
In case anyone's concerned/wondering/at all interested, my previous remarks regarding Valentine's Day weren't motivated by a sense of loneliness or misery. I just happened to think, "Oh yeh, I suppose it could be single awareness day." I had barely thought about it all day. Actually my biggest concern was that I was meeting a potential client at a restaurant at lunchtime to discuss a contract and I was concerned that people seeing me with him could get the wrong idea. The situation was saved, however, by the presence of a third party and a large pile of business-like paper on the table.
I was just thinking about Valentine's Day (which has just passed in my time zone). I noticed my good friend Steve had the title "Happy Single Awareness Day" on his MSN today and it got me thinking. There are a lot of issues I have with Valentine's Day.
Here they are in no particular order.
1) It has very little or nothing to do with Saint Valentine. It seems the closest link was that he was martyred on the 14th of February. Rather than remembering someone who really loved God to the point of surrendering his body to whatever end, people now buy dodgy cards with sexual messages and we have a day more focussed on sex than anything else.
2) It's a social obligation. Everyone in a relationship HAS to buy something for their significant other on Valentine's Day. If they don't, the world at large would agree that they are an unromantic whatever and the other person is better off without them. What happened to spontinaity? I think a lot of people don't really receive their gift at Valentine's Day because they know it's being given out of obligation. Hey, here's a thought. It's become religous. It's people doing what they're meant to do when they're meant to do it, regardless of whether they really want to.
3) It emphasises the solitude of those not in a relationship. As you get older and friends start pairing off it gets more noticeable. Trying to arrange anything on the 14th of February is pretty tricky because everyone (thanks to point #2) feels obliged to fulfill their social duty, national service or whatever you want to call it. In the end the "left overs" have to either sit and feel sorry for themselves or pretend that it's not really Valentine's Day and it's just another day (while checking the mail again just in case.)
4) It's a commercial rip-off. Everything is more expensive, such as flowers, chocolates and so on. First we have the social bullying to force you to buy things on a fairly un-special day and then we have the entrepreneurs cashing in on everyone's plight.
I'm going to stop at 4 because I don't want to appear completely heartless. I will say this. I am a romantic person. Really, I am. I just don't like being told when to be romantic. I'd much rather pick a random day each year to surprise that special someone in my life:
Something as simple as choosing a different day would show that you are thinking about the person and being creative and maybe even spontaneous. Now isn't that so much better than being religious?
Another thought is that maybe if people were generally more romantic the rest of the year, there wouldn't be the same pressure to produce the goods on Valentine's Day. I think a lot of people cling to Valentine's Day as a lifeline of the last hope they have of receiving some kind of affirmation because their significant other will at least do something on Valentine's Day. Let's rise above this, people! Let's be romantic ALL YEAR ROUND! It doesn't need to be expensive, just thoughtful.
Ok, I'll get off my soapbox now. I just need to check the mail. I think something might have got stuck behind the door...
Yes, it's true! I am really going to Rio! A team of us from the church are going this summer to do some practical work on a school building in the City of God, a favela (slum) in Rio de Janeiro. We will be there for around 10 days at the end of May. I'm pretty excited about it already! I've never visited the southern hemisphere before and Ali, my wee sister, already beat me to it so I need to catch up.
More importantly, though, it's really great to be part of something that actually matters. I often think to myself, "How much of what I do with my life really matters?" In the end, when all is said and done, what will last? I love snowboarding and rock climbing but it's not going to be these moments that count for much. It's going to be the times I showed kindness, compassion or love to someone who really needed it.
I've been learning about Rio in preparation for the trip. I've watched a few DVDs that are fiction, although they're based on the kind of thing that happens there. I've seen Cidade de Deus (City of God) and Cidade dos Homens.(City of Men) Both deal a lot with the day-to-day trials of children living in poverty and tempted by the drug culture as the easy way to make a lot of money.
Something that I realised while watching was that a lot of these kids don't set out to be drug dealers. They simply want to make money to survive. I know there are those who crave the power, the status and the notoriety but there are others who just want to make some money. It's so hard for these kids to make money any other way.
I really feel for the street children in Rio and I hope that by me going there I can show them love, maybe communicate to them that someone cares and the world's not forgotten about them.
Now would be a good time to mention that I'm raising my own funds for the trip. If anyone is interested in helping me out, please comment and we can talk.
I bought a loaf of bread today that boasted the title "Extra Thick White". You can imagine my surprise when the "heel" turned out to be almost as long as my thumb! The rest of the loaf wasn't as thick, thankfully. It would probably have only had 6 slices if they were.
I uploaded some new photos on my Flickr account. I can't be bothered crfeating individual links for them all in here. If you want to see them, go to my Flickr page. Photos include Shocking numbers of empty bottles a new year (not mine), The Cave and Lego Hair.
I've discovered an amazing Christian website. It's called xxxchurch.com. I know many of you are already freaking out about the name because it has the "xxx" prefix. Allow me to explain, though.
The two guys who run the website have a vision for reaching people in the porn industry. They're pretty radical in their approach as well. While many Christians would just greet such people with the attitude of "you're sick, you need to stop that", their attitude is to show them God's love. After all, that's what Jesus did. He loved the people society turned their back on.
One of the radical things that Craig and Mike do is to go to porn exhibitions and set up a booth with the message "Jesus loves Porn Stars". They get all kinds of reactions but the message they're spreading is that Jesus loves everyone, whether that be pastors, nice Christians or even people in the porn industry. They write about their experiences on their blog.
At one such event they met a girl called Trinity who really wanted to get out of the porn industry but didn't have the money to do anything else. They launched an appeal for her on their website and raised enough money for her to go to college. Now she's moved to a different state, away from her old life. She's now studying cosmetology, which is what she had wanted to do all along. She has a blog where you can follow her progress in her new life.
As well as reaching out to people in the porn industry, Mike and Craig do a lot for churches to help people overcome addiction to porn. Let's face it, it's everywhere and being in the church doesn't make you immune. They do presentations at churches, talking about this issue. They also have a prayer wall on their website which is a forum where people can request prayer and discuss their struggles. They also have free accountability software which sends a list of everywhere you've been on the internet to an accountability partner every couple of weeks. I installed it on my computer. It's really simple and doesn't slow anything down.
I'm just so impressed with this ministry. They've got a really bold approach to the problem and I love it. I know it's going to bear a lot of fruit.
On Saturday (the last day of 2005) I had the amazing opportunity to go ice climbing. We went to a place called The Ice Factor. They have the biggest indoor ice climbing facility in the world! They have all kinds of technology that keeps the room like a giant fridge with lots of real ice on the walls!
It's quite strange after doing rock climbing. The things that hold you to the wall are the ice axes and the crampons. (sharp pointy bits on your boots) At first it feels quite clumsy, swinging these big pointy axes around but it started to feel a bit more natural after a while. I found that as I got more tired, it got harder and harder to actually lift an axe and swing it at the wall. My left arm got so tired that sometimes I'd swing and it'd deflect off the surface because I was unable to hold it straight. Other times it was tricky to get it OUT of the wall when I wanted to climb higher.
The funnest moment was when I was about a third of the way up the wall. I had one axe free because I was about to reach higher to stick it in there. Just as I moved a bit, though, the other axe slipped out of the crack in the ice that it was lodged into. Slowly, I started to rotate backwards, my feet still gripping the ice with the crampons. Instinctively, I swung at the wall with my right axe and it stuck in, immediately stopping the fall. It was a pretty cool moment, kinda like something out of a cheezy film.
It's all good fun, really. Doing something like that indoors is so much safer than out there in the REAL world. Man, it's a crazy sport, I tell you! We had the ropes anchored to metal girders which made up part of the structure of the ice room. (If you click on the picture you can see this more clearly in the big version.) When people ice climb "for real" they put big screws into the ice. Yes, THE ICE! The only thing holding them up is water. OK, frozen water but still. Man, it's water! I know that it was only ice I was gripping on my way up the wall as well. The difference is that when I did slip, the rope was attached to something more reliable.
Having said all that, it was a great experience and hopefully I'll get a chance to do it again some time. Now, if I can just find somewhere I can go snowboarding to try out my new bindings...
I was opening my presents this morning and for possibly the first Christmas in my life, I started to think of the symbolism of what we do at Christmas. In church life we're always careful to make sure everyone realises the symbolism when they take communion yet I find we don't think so much about it at Christmas.
What do I mean? Well, I'll explain a bit further. As I unwrapped my presents I wasn't focussed on the gifts themselves. I didn't even think of the kings and the gifts that they brought. As I peeled the shiny paper from various items, I thought of Jesus, God's gift to humanity, His answer to our condition. The gift of God, wrapped in flesh and blood, held together not by some cheap sticky-tape but by the love of the Father.
The gift was free. There was no persuading God or twisting his arm. It was his agenda all along to extravagantly give this gift to us. It's our choice if we just leave him under the tree.
That's not just a reference to salvation, either. How many times do we bang our head against the wall, forgetting the Christmas present we got a few years back that could solve the situation? How often do we call on Jesus? How often do I call on Jesus? Not enough. Not nearly enough. I complain to him a great deal. I don't think that really counts, though. I just find myself sounding more and more like a bunch of people that ended up getting eaten by the desert this one time...
Let's all remember the value of what we've got at our disposal.
OK, so last night when I took the pic of my straight hair, I thought I should do a profile as well, to give you a better idea of the shocking transformation that took place.
I just got my hair cut at Mika on Kilmarnock Road. The girl that cut it encouraged me to leave the top to grow and she just trimmed the fringe and the back and sides. (Does that make it a short back and sides?) Anyway, she also STRAIGHTENED it which was quite a big deal, considering the amount of hair I have these days. The best part of all was that despite the time she spent straightening it, she only charged me £4.50 because she just cut the back and sides. Sweet!
UPDATE:
I should add that I actually took 30 pictures with my camera-phone before finding this one that I thought was good. Criteria were not cropping part of my head from the pic and remembering not to look too serious although really concentrating.
Also, every time I look in the mirror I think I'm a Romulan from Star Trek!
Tonight I watched Hotel Rwanda and it really moved me. The story is based, I believe quite closely, on actual events during the genocide in Rwanda in 1994. While angry Hutu mobs roamed the streets killing their Tutsi neighbours, one man opened up his hotel to welcome in refugees as they sought to save their lives from the massacre. The UN refused to stick around to protect them either. Foreign military only came to escort the white visitors to safety, leaving the Rwandans to fend for themselves.
It just made something inside me cry out at the injustice. I've no idea what it feels like to be in such a situation but you must feel so utterly helpless. I don't know what it must be like to watch people beaten and killed, knowing you can't do a thing to stop it. I felt it to some extent as I watched this film, though.
I think that seeing a situation of great suffering stirs something in you. It provokes a sense of compassion which maybe doesn't easily surface in me, at least. It prompts a response. It asks the question, "What do you want to do about this?"
I just feel more and more that here in the West we really have so much. We have it so easy in so many ways yet we still complain. God, let us appreciate the peace we have in our land. Let us be quick to run to those in need, regardless of the personal cost. Let our lives count for something.
He really was. I know you don't need me to educate you on this. I just saw a film last night that reminded me of the fact, though. It's called The Downfall and it proved to be a very interesting and educational film. It is actually all in German with English subtitles which I found to be really interesting. I like hearing other languages and I feel that we're very guilty in the English-speaking west of isolating ourselves from other languages.
The film tells the story of the last days inside Hitler's bunker as the Red Army closed in on Berlin and Germany's defeat became apparent. It's told from the view of Traudl Junge who was Hitler's secretary during the war. She actually wrote the story so it's pretty authentic.
I just found it interesting because often war films tend to show America or Britain and not really tell you much about the Germans other than the fact that they're the nasty people we're fighting against. In The Downfall, you see the humanity of some of the German officers and it was reassuring to learn that some of them genuinely cared about their people and wanted to protect the civillians and so on. Don't get me wrong here, though. Most of them were mental. I'm not condoning any Nazi ideals at all, just pointing out that there were real people there too.
This maybe isn't making much sense. I'd recommend seeing it if you want to learn more about that part of history, though. I think we can always learn from the past. I'm glad I didn't have to live then, right enough. Thank God for peace in our time.
I just got back to my flat in Glasgow after spending a week catching up with friends south of the border. For my North American friends, I hope you realise I'm not referring to Mexico but England :)
It's funny being in a different country. Even though we're technically under the same government and all that, it's still in the forefront of your mind that you're different. Some of you might say I'm different anyway but I'm talking about accent in particular. As soon as you open your mouth, everyone knows you're not from there.
I was in Bracknell for the most part of the week and I went for a jaunt into Bath for a day and a half as well. It was interesting driving to Bath with directions from multimap.com. We got lost once or twice but we got there in the end and that's always good.
I got the flights for £20 because I had enough Aeroplan points from previous trips with Air Canada. The cost was the airport tax which sadly isn't covered by the rewad points. Still, £20 for a return from Glasgow to Heathrow is pretty good. Checking in for the return flight they used my bank card to verify my ID which was new. It's a strange feeling to be in a plane without anyone having looked at your passport. It reminds me of when I drove from Toronto to Pittsburgh for Christmas and when I came back into Canada the guy didn't even check my passport. Another cool thing with domestic UK flights is that I checked in with less than an hour to go in both cases and everything was fine.
It was good to see friends again and catch up as well. I never really think of much to talk about but company is worth more than information to me anyway. I'm content to be around people, rather than probing for all the latest goings-on.
Why have two blogs, I hear you say? Well, they will both serve different purposes. This one is my fun fun fun "here's what's happening in my life" kind of blog. The other one will be more work work work "here's what I'm doing with programming" kind of blog. I want potential customers to be able to see what I'm doing programming wise to build trust in my abilities. There's also some book or other called blog marketing that some guy I know wrote. It suggests blogs are a good tool to communicate with potential customers.
I recently signed up with Google Analytics after seeing mention of it in Jeremy Wright's blog. It's pretty cool. It collects all kinds of stats regarding your visitors that I'd never even have thought about. Don't worry, it's not spyware. It's relevant information such as where in the world you're all from, what screen resolution you have, how many colours you have, what version of flash you have installed, whether or not you have JavaScript enabled and so on. All these things are really important for webmasters to know their audience and adapt the appearance of their site accordingly.
There was also a ton of marketing stuff that I've not really looked at yet but I think you can track the effectiveness of ads you've placed on other websites.
This map shows where everyone is from who's been looking at my blog recently. (Do click for a bigger image!) It's really cool to see all the nations that I've been in contact with, mostly through the School of Ministry and TACF.
Now I just need to get more potential customers to visit my company website and then I'll be in business. Wait, I am in business. I could just use a few more customers!
I bought some chilies recently and I was fascinated by the change of colours if you leave them for long enough. It's like having your own wee autumn on the shelf!
I was just musing to myself about some moments that would normally have to be expressed purely by word of mouth before people started carrying cameras everywhere with them. Watch in wonder and amazement as I give you the fruit of my camera phone toil and present a moment of bewilderment and repulsion captured when I discovered a glittery thong - in the men's section I might add - while shopping recently: Don't you just love technology and how it enriches our lives on a daily basis?
I love autumn. It's a great season. The trees in particular go through an amazing transformation as the leaves go from green to yellow, orange, red and brown. I love the fact that God's such an artist. Trees don't just die before winter. They die with style! Does anyone else think of soggy corn flakes when they see wet orange leaves in a pile at the side of the road or is that just me?
November the 5th has come and gone but thoughts of it still linger. I lit a banger with a match. Has anyone seen my finger?
So hey, yesterday was Guy Fawkes night or "bonfire night" as it's also known. Those of you from outside the UK may not be aware of this occasion but to sum it up, there was once a conspiracy to blow up the houses of parliament and they were caught in the nick of time, with all sorts of barrels of gunpowder stacked in the basement ready to go. One guy (ho ho) called Guy Fawkes took the fall for it, quite literally. That is to say, he was executed for it. I don't know if he was hanged but probably.
Celebrations of the aversion of disaster take the form of setting off fireworks and sometimes having a bonfire, maybe even with an effigy of Guy Fawkes burned in it for good measure, or dodgy ritual as I suspect.
The picture above is a rocket I found in the street outside my flat this morning on my way to church.
I've just seen a very impressive, literally "amazing" advert here. I mean, this had me actually chuckling and saying things like "no way" out loud, as I sat at my computer. Credit must go to the author of this blog post where I found the link.
I just found out LOADS of interesting things about the Back to the Future movies that I never knew before. It's amazing how many clever references people write into movies to pay tribute to films they liked in the past, or naming things after wives and so on.
If you're interested, here are the trivia links for Back to the Future parts 1 and 2:
In case you're not convinced about the merits of reading the trivia, let me show you the COOLEST one I discovered:
The mall where Marty McFly meets Doc Brown for their time travel experiment is called "Twin Pines Mall". Doc Brown comments that old farmer Peabody used to own all of the land, and he grew pines there. When Marty goes back in time, he runs over and knocks down a pine tree on the Peabody's property. When he comes back to the mall at the end of the film, the sign at the mall identifies the mall as "Lone Pine Mall".
Here are some pics to prove it. I just grabbed these straight from DVD:
I love the fact that someone went to the trouble of doing that. It makes me smile.
(I'm watching part 3 tomorrow, maybe I'll read up on the trivia now.)
For the past six months or so, I've had a kind of nagging craving in the back of my mind that I really should watch Back to the Future. I can't explain it, other than it being like really missing an old friend.
On monday, I signed up with my local video shop and rented the completed Back to the Future trilogy on DVD! Last night I watched the first one and it's still as good as ever. OK, so the special effects are pretty dated by today's standards but the thing I realized was just how great a story it is. I suppose it's the ingredient of time travel that really opens up the plot options to writer(s?) but still I think it's definitely one of the better ones.
Tonight I was watching Back to the Future Part 2 and I noticed something very spooky at the start. Just after the opening credits it states the date as October 26th, 1985. I thought October 26th looked a bit familiar and then I checked today's date. Today is the 27th, meaning I watched part 1 of Back to the Future EXACTLY TWENTY YEARS after it was set! How cool is that? I thought it was noteworthy at least.
Part II was brilliant as well. They really took things to a new level with the plot going back AND forward in time. Especially the idea that someone had gone back in time creating a tangent on the space/time continuum, leaving them unable to go forward in time again to stop him going back because they were now on a different time line. There's not many movies that would attempt to put something as cool as that in there. Sure, their idea of the future wasn't exactly accurate but it'd just be too freaky if everyone really was using wireless Internet, laptops and mobiles. I still want a hoverboard, though.
Tomorrow I'll watch Part III but I think it's safe to say that 30 years later, Back to the Future still has the magic! Great Scott!
I just had a great idea today for the more geeky parent to be.
I thought what would be cooler than a baby progress bar? That's right. Imagine an item that could be safely stuck to the tummy of the mum-to-be, indicating to anyone who's interested how far through the pregnancy she is! Wouldn't that just be so cool? I think it would be. Before you get concerned, I'm not going to take things to the extreme of that guy last year who named his baby version 2.0.
Come to think of it, it'll be a while before I'll be in need of such a product, since I won't be having any babies until I solve the "still needing to get a wife" problem which in turn is complicated by the "still needing to get a girlfriend" problem. Ho hum, I can always make money off those who are a bit further down the track in these things in the mean time, though.
I don't know if you're like me but whenever I get a Guinness, I always feel the need to try the "face" test. The face test (ok, I'm sure no-one else calls it that) is when you make a face in the head and then see if it's still there at the end of the pint. A "good" Guinness will preserve the face to the bitter (ho ho) end.
By that definition, this pint wasn't a good Guinness. It just goes to show for all you Canadians that we don't get perfect Guinness in Glasgow either. Maybe one would need to go on some kind of pilgrimage to Dublin to get the real deal. I suppose there's the argument of how it's poured as well, I suppose.
Actually, I heard an interesting story about the origins of Guinness. The inventor, a Christian man, (presumably Mr. Guinness) noticed how a significant number of the working-class men in Ireland were going straight to the pub when they got paid and then drinking all their earnings, neglecting to feed themselves properly in the process.
Concerned by this, he created Guinness to be a meal replacement. It actually has all the nutrients and whatever that you might get from a normal meal. It was made with alcohol, so people would drink it but it was designed to be difficult to actually get drunk on, although I have to say I've never tried. I've even heard of doctors recommending Guinness to nursing mothers who've been having a hard time producing enough milk for the baby. Strange but true.
Today is a sad day. Well, not very sad but a moment to reflect at least. You see, I finally decided it was time to get a new wallet because I've had this one for years. At least since 2002, maybe even 2001. I had this one with me in Germany on outreach in 2002 and I actually lost it. Then I retraced my steps in the dark and found it in the middle of the road! It was the strangest thing. I drove over a wallet-shaped shadow and thought, "Hmm, that could be it." and then dismissed the idea. Then I remembered that I was in fact LOOKING for my wallet so it would really make sense to check out wallet-shaped clues. I did a u-turn and came back to the spot and there it was. Nothing was missing.
My new wallet is different and it brings attention to the fact that I'm very accustomed to the other one. It opens to the left while the old one opens to the right so I keep opening the new one upside-down and then saying to myself, "Oh yeh, it's my new wallet." Also, the zip opens from left to right while the old one was from right to left. I really don't know how I'm going to cope. I'll try to be strong - for the sake of my blog readers.
Today is a sad day. I've now finished the ten free fruit smoothies that Innocent Drinks sent to me as an apology for the yoghurt thickie I bought that was off. I still have the bottles on my shelf to help me remember the good times, though.
Look at that, that's amazing! You can add images directly to blogger these days. I don' t know how long it's been like that but that's handy to know. I've been using Flickr for a while now as the more avid TheKen-blog-followers will know. (If you didn't know that, stop reading this and go to my flickr images and start commenting on my amazing pics immediately.)
This picture to the left is a bottle of wine, decorated simply yet effectivley with a decoration my good friend Heidi Lichti gave me just before I left Canada. Apparently in Canada they have traditions about bringing bread and wine to a new house to symbolise things like provision and prosperity. (I think.) Anyway, this was the first bottle in my new flat so Heidi, that's your wine-bottle-decoration put to good use.
I'm seriously impressed with the people who work at Innocent Drinks. (innocentdrinks.co.uk) I've been a huge fan of their fruit smoothies and yoghurt thickies for a number of years now. Of course, I've also been living in Canada for the last 3 years so it's been a difficult distance relationship. In fact, I actually missed innocent drinks while I was in Canada. I really did. Whenever I came home to visit, I always had to go out and buy one.
It was when buying my first innocent drink after moving home to Scotland that this latest adventure all began. I bought a yoghurt thickie at a shop in Glasgow Central Station (I won't name and shame them here) and hopped on the train to Greenock, to go see Mum & Dad. Well, after the obligatory shaking up of the bottle, I was surprised to hear a fizzing sound when I opened it. I drank some and it tasted fizzy and seemed thinner than usual. Oh, not to forget that when it fizzed to begin with, it actually overflowed onto my hand and the floor of the train. It was quite a tricky moment.
Well, the good people at Innocent Drinks were kind enough to offer me a case of their finest drinks as a peace offering after I reported the unfortunate event to them. A whole case! I got TEN FREE SMOOTHIES because I bought one bad one! Amazing!
Here are some pics of me enjoying my new smoothies after they arrived today. If you follow the links, you'll see bigger pictures along with comments from yours truly. (That's me)
If you're still reading, you obviously find this interesting. Why not check out what they have to say about cranberries.
Wow! We just had an incredible conference at Glasgow Elim. It was called Seasoned in the Prophetic and we had an amazing speaker by the name of Graham Cooke.
All through the conference I felt an excitement stirring within me. It's hard to pinpoint exactly but it was a very real, physical manifestation of the power of God on me, almost like something inside my chest would explode. It only seemed to diminish in intensity between sessions when I'd go out and get something to eat, talk to friends and that sort of thing. The whole time I was sitting in the conference God was just ON me. It was pretty intense. It didn't seem to be in response to what he was saying although there were key moments when it definitely got more intense as though God was underlining something that had just been said.
The conference was really about the character of God, though, and how we should respond to things that happen to us, what we should ask God. Rather than saying "Why is this happening to me?" we should be asking "What are you teaching me here?" and "What do you want me to do here?" We tend to respond wrongly by saying things like "I'm a Christian! Get me out of this!" when God's saying "You just don't get it, do you?"
Another really cool thing was about God seeing us present-future but we get caught up in our past and see ourselves past-present. We don't think we can do the things he's called us to because of our past whereas he sees us in the future and we're much better looking than we are now! If you have a prophetic word about your future and you don't see how it could happen, remember that God wants to change you into the person that can do these things. The time from prophecy received to prophecy fulfilled is a time of transformation when God changes our very personality!
Finally, I thought it was so cool that God wants to BE our strength in our areas of weakness. We somehow think we need to get rid of our weaknesses but in 2 Cor 12:10, Paul suggest otherwise. God actually wants to take over and make up for the lack in those moments when our weaknesses are challenged. We need to let him take over when we are in an area of weakness.
It's funny because when I heard Heidi Baker for the first time in 2002, I declared after that I'd been "Baked". Now after Graham Cooke, I've been "Cooke'd". It seems that God has a culinary theme regarding his dealings with me. It'll be interesting to see how he turn's the Todd Bentley conference I'm going to next month into a food theme!
Last night I had a very interesting camping experience with Alan and Collin Gibson. We set out to spend the night in a cave beside Loch Lomond but we left a bit late in the day which made things a bit more complicated. By the time we got to the nearest car park, it was 8 o'clock in the evening and completely dark. It was an overcast night as well so there was very little light. Only the two head-mounted torches that Alan and Collin had brought with them provided any illumination. I watched my step by following their lights along the path.
As time went past, we became a bit uncertain of the path and after a few scouting explorations here and there, we decided to sleep on the beach instead. Now, this posed a small problem as we didn't have any tents. Undaunted, however, Alan managed to create a shelter he called "a bendy" which consists of a small sapling bent over and tied to a secure spot on the ground (a convenient root that protruded above the surface) allowing us a framework to add other coverings to.
We made a fire and settled down for the night enjoying foods ranging from Scottish Cheddar to an obscure Russian beer from the Baltic somewhere. We were having a good laugh and enjoying the whole camping/bivvying experience and decided to turn in for the night just after midnight.
I started off just using my sleeping bag as a pillow because I felt fine in my clothes, not too cold at all. After nodding off for a while like this, I woke up feeling cold and decided to jump into the sleeping bag. No sooner had I done this than the heavens opened and it rained. It got heavier and it got lighter and that cycle pretty much kept repeating ALL NIGHT. Sadly the shelter we had constructed didn't really cover us overhead and, consequently we got seriously rained on. I remember a few distinct landmarks in the night's events:
* The "I'm getting rained on" phase * The "Now my legs are wet" phase * The "Oh, my socks are wet too, now" phase * The "I can't stop shivering" phase * The "Isn't it morning yet?" phase
Finally at around half past 6, Alan had had enough and we all packed up and left. It was still dark. I still saw no sign of daylight. It was only when we reached the car that it started getting light and the rain stopped too!
Since we were completely drookit, we decided to remove our trousers to minimise the soaking of the seats in the car. I was relieved to also discover that my phone had survived the night in my rucksack, under the in-built rain cover which I had deployed when packing everything up the night before.
As if this wasn't enough drama for one night, we discovered just after driving onto the road that the car had a flat tyre. "One for all and all for one," I said and in no time we had three drowned rats in the boxers changing the wheel of a car at 6:30 in the morning. We must have been a sight.
I finally made it home and put my stuff in the wash along with my week's laundry. I had a much needed shower and then discovered on taking my clothes out of the machine that I had left a Tracker bar (kind of granola cereal bar) in the pocket of my trousers. There were bits of peanut, toffee etc. stuck to ALL of the things that were in the washing machine.
Oh well, it seems I'm not quite as Wild at Heart as I thought I was because most of the night I was wishing it was all over. We did laugh about it, though, which is always good. You need to see the funny side of these adventures.
Today was a special day. I finally got over my fear and led a small group meeting. Simon (my pastor) had asked me to lead some guys in the church who were keen to get a guys' small group up and running. In the past I had always felt weary about the notion of becoming a cell leader in TACF. I don't know if it was the notion of coming up with a teaching or the fact that I was wiped from work that put me off. I just didn't feel like it.
This time it's different, though. When Simon was talking to me about it I started to feel genuine interest for the guys and a motivation to help them and pass on what I'd learned. This hasn't always been the case!
Tonight we met for the first time and I talked a bit about my experience at the School of Ministry and how walking in the light had dealt with some of my ungodly beliefs about myself. We had a soaking time as well. Levi (my lappy) was on hand to provide the soaking music. Having a laptop's so useful!
I went to the SoM Reunion in England this weekend which was really cool. I drove down with Alan Gibson in his car. We shared the driving and got there WAY too early. It started at 6:30pm but we were there at half one. Oh well, not to worry.
It was cool catching up with people I knew and meeting new people who had been to TACF. It's funny how you quickly connect with people through the common experience. Maybe the fact that we've all gone through a bit of inner healing probably helped, too. People were surprised that we drove from Scotland, though. I think in the UK we don't really expect to drive too much. Whether it's the price of petrol or just the fear of putting miles on the clock, there's something that's putting people off.
Anway, the reunion - we had a lot of worship and some social time as well. We prophecied over each other, prayed for healing, had a laugh. All the good stuff really. I don't know when the next one will be but I think I'll probably go again.
I'm excited to announce the safe arrival of LEVI! No, I haven't secretly been fathering children in my spare time, Levi is my wonderful new laptop computer system! He's weighing in at 2.38 kg he is a bit on the light side but he's perfectly healthy. He's a Samsung X20 HVM 740 or just an X20 for short. I've been busy running Windows Update and downloading all sorts of things to get him ready for work. I'm still waiting for the copy of Visual Studio that I bought from a guy in The States. I expect it to arrive this week.
I also bought a nice wee bag for Levi today so now I can take him with me. (which is really the idea with a laptop.)
I noticed tonight when talking to a friend on the phone that my brain has been racing at a hundred miles an hour recently. It's a bit concerning. I mean, seriously, I've never done speed but if it does what the name implies, I think I've had a similar experience. I was confused about this because I've not been drinking any coffee lately. It then crossed my mind that tea actually has more caffiene than the former and I've certainly been drinking my fair share of that. Could it be that my lack of caffiene intake prior to returning home has resulted in my having a lower tolerance? I think it's probably what's going on.
Well, it's been a crazy few weeks but I think I'm finally making progress getting settled in Glasgow again. It was a bit of a strange adjustment to begin with. I had forgotten the PIN number for my debit card and the phone number for my mobile was one that I hadn't used in ages either. I was also staying with friends and I couldn't remember their address or post code so really, when all was said and done, I didn't know a great deal.
I've signed a lease and got the keys for my new flat in the south side of Glasgow. I'm quite excited about that. Now I can start updating my address information with everything to my new place. I'm trying to get power, phone, internet and furniture sorted out though. My new laptop should arrive tomorrow and my software will be here soon enough.
My new place is quite close to a park. I'm pretty excited about that. I've been meeting up with a few friends from church to go jogging once a week at the unlikely hour of 7am. Amazingly, I've been able to get there on time and actually do a reasonable work out. I think I'll aim to jog every day because working from home doesn't give you much reason to leave the house.
The weather's been pretty sunny but the last couple of days it's got cloudier and more like the Scotland that I remember.
I just discovered that my most recent blog entry had 7 comments. This was a bit of a surprise as I hadn't received any e-mail notifications. I excitedly opened the list to read what all my friends had written about what I personally consider to be one of my best blog entries so far.
You can imagine my disappointment when I discovered my first bit of blog comment spam. Man, is nothing sacred any more? It's getting to the point where anywhere you can submit text to a page someone's going to try to use it to market something stupid to you. Well, thankfully Blogger have a mechanism to handle that. I have now switched on the "word verification" feature. You've probably seen something similar before. You just need to read the text shown in an image on the screen and type it into the box underneath it. Programs can't do that so by doing so you prove that you're a real person leaving a real comment rather than a program that's going through all the blogs and dumping unwanted advertising in there.
(sigh) Sometimes it's just annoying when your privacy is violated like that. It annoys me. I wish people would just stop trying to sell me their crap all the time.
I'm home! I made it back safely to the home of haggis, kilts and The Ken.
I had a fairly decent 5 and a half flight with Air Transat directly from Toronto to Glasgow. I was sitting in the very back row, just in front of the toilets. I was thinking of some pros and cons of the location of my seat:
Back Row (General) Pro: I could recline the seat without worrying about disturbing the person behind me. Pro: Nobody could dig their knees into my back. Pro: As well as under the seat in front of me, I was able to put things under my own seat. Pro: I was one of the first allowed to board because they boarded by row number. This allowed me to put my bag in the overhead compartment before it got filled up. Con: I was one of the last people off the plane.
Proximity of Toilet Pro: If I needed to go, it was easy to get to. Con: A lot of other people used it too and every time the door opened, I got a whiff of their contribution. Con: People squeezing past my seat on the way to the toilet frequently brushed past my shoulder with their bottom, creating mixed reactions depending on the individual.
Video Screens in the middle of the cabin Con: People going back and forth to the toilet and cabin crew doing their duties frequently blocked my view of the screen.
So, all in all it was a mixed experience.
I arrived at 6:15 this morning and I've slept maybe 2 hours since then! This morning I went to Glasgow Elim for the first time in ages. It was really great to see everyone again. There was a real sense of coming home, a great spiritual family vibe. The worship was amazing as well. God seems so much closer here. It's strange, I'm just connecting with him a lot better all of a sudden and really feeling the love and acceptance that I've been craving for so long.
I went again this evening and there was a baptisimal service. I didn't know any of the people who were getting baptised but I'm sure I'll get to know new people sooner or later. It's really great being back and renewing old friendships with friends that I've known for years. I realise now how much I was suffering in Toronto from having no roots or established connections there. Everything was just so transient and temporary. It was hard to feel settled. I'm excited for what God's got for this next chapter of my life. I really am.
Well, this is it. It's the end of my time in Toronto. I stopped working a month ago when I got the news that I had to leave but I've still been around.
I've been getting everything finalised for my move back to Scotland. There were so many bits and pieces to organise but at last I'm ready. I've still not packed most of my things. I'm going to do that tonight. I just hope I can fit everything into my suitcase and rucksack. Otherwise I suppose I'll just have to throw some things out. It's funny, I've felt for the longest time that I'm always on the move. I never feel really settled anywhere. Canada, especially, had a very temporary feel about it with the question of work permits coming round each year. I had intended to avoid that by getting Permanent Residence but that still hasn't finished processing. The decision to apply for that was really so that I could choose my own return date and so I could work for whoever I wanted while still in Canada. I don't know if I really wanted to stay here forever anyway.
I'll see how things go in Scotland. It's going to be a bit of an adjustment back to Scottish life. I've probably lost my accent a bit and I still find myself thinking and speaking in Canadian. It doesn't sound so odd to say that about French or German or another non-English language like that but the thing is that even with variants of English, you still switch from one set of terminology to another. At least I do, maybe I'm just different. In Scotland I say "crisps" and in Canada I say "chips". Then you've got pavement/sidewalk, road/pavement, pram/stroller, gutter/eaves trough. (yeh - that's an obscure one to know)
It's been a funny time here in Toronto. When I started working in the IT Department I felt totally underqualified and there was a large team of programmers at the time as well. Then with the finance issues we faced a few years back due to Sars, everyone else got laid off, leaving only me really. For a while I was the only programmer here and I had the freedom (and burden) of making all the decisions about how my programs would be written. It's a bitter-sweet situation, really. We all like to make the decisions, but not to be the one responsible for their consequences. Hmm, that's one to ponder actually...
